Can You Spot a Cheater?

Do you think he’s cheating… when he really isn’t?

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Before we begin, tell me which guys in the relationships below are cheating:
1. Hannah and Andre have been dating for 2 years.They’ve talked about getting married. She even thinks he’s been pricing some rings…
2. Elisa and Malik are like the “old couple” among their friends – they’ve been together now for 5 years, and even though they haven’t ever discussed marriage, she isn’t seeing other guys. She refers to him as “my partner” and they have a vibrant sex life.
3. Jasmin and Darren started seeing each other about 4 months ago, and are ecstatically in love. They talk on the phone multiple times every day, and go out on a date several times a week. Last week he moved in with her.
Wait!
Before you tell me which of the guys in these three relationships do you think is cheating, let me tell you this: Every single one of those guys is seeing other women.
Does that surprise you? Make you angry?
Before you start throwing things (and for the record, I just made those three couples up, and I realize I didn’t give you much information to go on) you should know: the reason I ask is because I think this is an issue that crops up ALL THE TIME for women, and there’s a huge issue underneath the word “cheating”… And THAT’S the real issue we need to discuss…

How most women define cheating

Most women would tell you that if two people are “together” and one of them “sees” other people, that’s cheating. I’m not convinced there’s even one guy in the world who would agree with that definition, though.
And here’s why THAT is really, really bad for all the women in the world.
When a woman has that definition of cheating, she often completely gives over her life to a man who isn’t doing the same. In other words, he’s “won” her and may now either a) lose interest, or b) enjoy and keep all the “benefits” of a relationship with her but never make a commitment, even though she’s made a commitment to him.
If you hope for and want to be married someday, you could lose years of your life this way, waiting for a man who isn’t waiting for you.

So how SHOULD you define cheating?

In my world, “cheating” is a word reserved only for two situations.
First, where two people have made a clear and explicit agreement to date only each other and one of them breaks that agreement.
And second, in a marriage when one person “dates” (meaning sees because they’re sexually or deeply emotionally interested in) another.

Why you should (both) date other people until you are (both) ready to commit

There’s a big difference between dating and exclusivity. If you are a woman who is seeking a committed, exclusive relationship or marriage, one of the best things you could do to secure a commitment is to NOT be so easily won!
I’m not at all saying “play hard to get” – I’m saying look for the man who is going to commit, and don’t stop looking until you find him!
This actually not only keeps you from losing years of your life with a man who isn’t going to commit, it also makes you extremely desirable among men!

How to get him to commit to you

First, you need to clearly communicate (and this is delicate, and I talk more about it in “Capture His Heart and Make Him Love You Forever”) exactly how long you’re willing to date without a commitment.
Then, you need keep dating other guys until the two of you explicitly agree to be exclusive.
I know it’s hard to spend time seeing, spending time with, and enjoying other guys when all you want is to fall happily into the arms of this one particular man, but until you two agree that you are each other’s “only and forever,” that’s the best path toward your dreams.

How to make him BEG you to be his (and his only!)

If you’re sick of “Bad Boys,” “Players,” and guys who just won’t commit, you need to go watch this new video renowned relationship expert Michael Fiore put up. It’s called “3 Steps To Make A Man Love You” and it teaches you how to make a man not just “fall” for a you… But to actually make him obsessed with you so HE decides he WANTS to be serious…

–> Make him powerfully addicted (in a really good way) to you!
Michael lays out the absolute truth about what men really want and need from a woman for them to be able to give EVERYTHING to her… (In fact, he flat out tells you how his girlfriend captured his heart and made him fall for her HARD even though he was “playing the field” and thought he’d never settle down.)

4 Signs of a Cheating Wife

Do you suspect that your wife is cheating on you?   If you do, you are definitely not alone.  Infidelity is actually quite common these days. You can see it all over television and almost everyone has known someone who has been cheated on, in one way or another. 

If you are a husband who thinks that your wife is cheating on you, there are a number of signs that you will want to be on the lookout for.   The following are four signs that could very well confirm your suspicions.

1 – A Change in Appearance

If your wife has gone through a change in appearance, it could be a sign that she is cheating on you.  What you will want to look for is small, but significant changes in appearance. 

For example, has she always worn glasses but has all of a sudden opted for contact lenses?  Has your wife recently started showing more skin?  Dressing provocatively is a common sign of cheating, especially if your wife typically dresses conservatively.  Switching perfumes or wearing it more often can be another sign of cheating.  This can be done to impress a new man or to cover up another man’s scent.

2 – A Change in Affection

A change in the amount of affection that your wife gives you could be seen as a sign of having an affair.  For example, has your love life been happy and healthy in the past?  Was your relationship filled with fun, adventure, and great sex?  If so, has that changed?  If your wife no longer compliments you as she did before or does something as simple as pull away during a kiss, an affair may be going on.  Many cheating women try to avoid close contact with their husbands in fear of getting caught or letting their guilt show.

3 – Secrecy

A wife becoming more secretive can often point to an extramarital affair.  For example, does your wife spend too much time on the phone or the internet?  If so, what does she say when you ask her what she is doing?  If you receive a “nothing,” or a “not your business,” response, something may be going on. 

In keeping with phone and internet use, does your wife automatically hang-up the phone whenever you walk into a room?  Does she shut off the computer or try to block your view of it?  If so, your wife’s secrecy may mean that she is trying to cover up an affair.

4 – Changes in Bills

One of the simplest ways to catch a cheating wife is to start paying your bills.  In most relationships, this is the woman’s responsibility, but make it yours.  Examine your wife’s cell phone bills.  Does it show what phone numbers are called or what numbers text messages and pictures are received from?  Also, closely examine credit card bills. Are there expenses listed for hotel rooms, vacations, restaurants, or anything else that you have no idea about?  If so, your wife may be cheating on you.

The above mentioned signs are just a few of the many that you will want to look for in a cheating wife.  If you think that your wife is cheating on you, just be sure to keep your eyes and ears open.  Unfortunately for the cheaters, they often make mistakes.  Many women get so comfortable, that they slip up at one time or another.  If you know what to look for, this is when you may be able to catch your wife cheating.

If you do find out that your wife is cheating on you, you may want to carefully approach the subject.  Never confront your wife in front of your children.  No matter how angry you are, do not get violent and try to keep your voice at a reasonable level.  As hard as it can be, calming approaching the situation can better allow you and your wife to have an honest discussion.  This where you can decide what will happen you to and your relationship next.